Twenty-Two Into 40 Could Equal Serious Time
Friday, January 23rd, 2004 • Filed under Uncategorized •
Fox News reports that a hapless would-be armed robber barged into a 7-11 store with an unloaded rifle in an attempt to rob it. He tried loading the rifle once he entered the store, but found it difficult to cram the .40 caliber rounds into a .22 caliber chamber. Not to be disuaded by the laws of physics, he continued with his armed robbery only to suffer the wrath of three of the stores customers.
“He’s trying to cram a .40-caliber bullet into a .22-caliber rifle,” Broward County Sheriff’s Office spokesman Jim Leljedal told the newspaper. “It’s like twice as big as the gun will fit. It won’t go.”Despite his weapon’s lack of deadliness, the teen pointed the gun again at the cashier and said, “Give me the money — don’t make me do this.”
Three customers saw their chance and jumped on the gunman, tackling him, kicking him and finally standing on him until police showed up.
It would have been a better story had it read “kicking him until the police showed up.”
Next time hire a getaway driver
Friday, January 16th, 2004 • Filed under Uncategorized •
If you ever decide to streak through a Denny’s restaurant, don’t leave your car unlocked and running in the parking lot.
Three hijinking hot shots ran buck naked through a Denny’s restaurant in North Spokane, Wash., early Wednesday morning — only to find a harsh surprise waiting for them in the parking lot.Their car, which they’d left running in order to make a quick getaway, had been stolen. And, of course, their clothes were inside the car.
Suspect Calls For Help When Stolen Truck Gets Flat Tire
Tuesday, January 13th, 2004 • Filed under Uncategorized •
Here’s something to remember. If you ever steal a truck, steal some license plates, and load your stolen truck up with stolen merchandise, you probably ought not call the highway patrol for assistance with your flat tire.
Half pipe dreams
Tuesday, January 6th, 2004 • Filed under Uncategorized •
Skateboarding is in the rise in America. One of the consequences is increased wear and tear on sidewalks and concrete surfaces, many of which are private property. Business owners have taken to installing metal “skatestoppers”, which are brackets that act as mini speedbumps. They have pretty much make skating impossible. The response from skateboard enthusiasts has been less than warm.
“It’s kind of stupid to put them on the ledges and just ruin a nice-looking park,” said skater Jacob Witkowski. “I mean, we don’t ruin them that much by skating on the ledges.”
Gee, they aren’t doing “that much” damage. How representative of what’s wrong with America. Skaters are not just deriding property owners for safeguarding their property, they are issuing death threats and sending obscene letters.
But the boarder backlash has been fierce, with skaters firing off dozens of nasty e-mails to [Chris Loarie, inventor of skatestoppers] every day, vandalizing his trade show booths and even telephoning in death threats – prompting the FBI to step in.One letter read “Go to hell, on behalf of skaters,” according to Loarie.
Talk about a sense of entitlement. I can only hope that when these kids grow up, one day they will understand.