Guilty Conscience

Wednesday, November 30th, 2005 • Filed under Robberies • 3 Comments

A man allegedly held up a bank but returned the cash after feeling guilty about the whole ordeal. Just a few minutes after he left the bank with just over one thousand dollars in cash, the apologetic robber returned to make financial amends, according to police. According to the chief, after the heist, the suspect walked to a coin-operated laundry a block away and watched as police cars raced past the location to the crime scene. The suspect walked back to the bank, but was unable to reenter the establishment, because banking industry protocol dictates that banks be locked down after a robbery. The man banged on the windows and caught the attention of the very teller he had robbed. The woman alerted officers, who arrested the man without incident.

What a Dummy

Tuesday, November 22nd, 2005 • Filed under News Links • 1 Comment

When a Highway Patrol officer was making a routine traffic stop, he discovered two dummies inside the vehicle. But only one was human. The somewhat clever dumb criminal was driving in a carpool lane with a kickboxing dummy in his passenger seat. According to polive, officers patrolling the HOV lanes position themselves at the bottom of inclines, which allows them to see into approaching vehicles. Officers used this vantage point to discover an unusual detail about the other occupant of this criminal’s car: the passenger had no legs. The officer drove after the vehicle and ordered the driver to pull over. When he peered into the window, he saw a seat-belted and well-dressed dummy. The officer removed the dummy from the car and placed it on the side of the freeway, to the amusement of passing drivers. The driver was given a hefty citation, and his dummy was confiscated.

Next time just fill out the comment card

Monday, November 21st, 2005 • Filed under Uncategorized • 3 Comments

If you’re dissatisfied with the service when you’re out to lunch, don’t call the police because they don’t want to hear about it. Thirty-year old Sharita Williams of Houma (LA) allegedly dialed 9-1-1 to complain about her cold onion rings. She told the operator that the waiter at the Malt-N-Burger in Thibodaux refused to replace them. The police showed up, but it was to arrest Williams for wasting police resources. She is due in court next month.

No napping on the job!

Thursday, November 17th, 2005 • Filed under News Links • Comment

Breaking and entering is a physically demanding job for some. The owner of a tire shop allegedly forced his way into a business next door, and then he returned to his office and took a nap. Apparently he broke into a veterinarian’s office, stole an undisclosed amount of cash, office equipment, and vials of veterinary drugs and then returned to his store to sleep. Later, officers investigating the pet clinic robbery knocked on Mays’ door to ask if he had heard or seen anything during the break-in. The 26-year-old man reportedly was roused from his sleep by the knocking and told police that he’d heard the business’s alarm go off but did not see anything.
Mays then told the officer that he had to use the restroom and walked away. The police officer looked into the room and saw a computer that looked similar to the one reported stolen from the clinic, the report said. Police searched Mays and found cash and vials of drugs in his pockets. What was he thinking?

Take anything you want, but please don’t suck my toes!

Tuesday, November 15th, 2005 • Filed under News Links • 3 Comments

Police have finally caught an unusual crminal who had a fetish with toes. Apparently, this burglar has been taking his sleeping victims’ money and then can’t help himself when it comes to his victims feet. The suspect broke into a couple’s apartment on the night of Nov. 6 and stole some money. He then went into the couple’s bedroom, where they were sleeping, and began to fondle the male victim’s toes. The sleeping man reportedly woke up thinking he was being caressed by his partner. When he discovered it was not his partnet, he chased the burglar, who then fled in a truck. Police later used the truck description to track down and arrest this burglar. Police later said Russell was known to have a foot fetish. He allegedly once broke into a woman’s home and woke her up by sucking on her toes. Russell was charged with residential entry and burglary. He is in Johnson County Jail on
$100,000 bond.

Get a room (or just come over to my place)

Monday, November 7th, 2005 • Filed under Other • Comment

Women’s public restrooms must be A LOT CLEANER than men’s. I don’t care how drunk you are, having sex in a bathroom stall of a nightclub is gross, and apparently frowned upon in Florida.

Two Carolina Panthers cheerleaders were charged after their arrest at a bar where witnesses told police the women had sex in a restroom.

Renee Thomas, 20, of Pittsboro, N.C., and Angela Keathley, 26, of Belmont, N.C., were taken to Hillsborough County Jail early Sunday.

Witnesses said the women were having sex in a stall with each other, angering patrons waiting in line to get into the restroom at the club in the Channelside district.

But the trouble didn’t stop there. Ms. Thomas was charged with battery for allegedly hitting a bar patron as she left the restroom. She then got into even more trouble when she gave police officers a driver’s license that was not hers. Thomas faces charges for “giving a false name and causing harm to another”, a third degree felony. Keathley faces misdemeanor charges for disorderly conduct and resisting arrest.

UPDATE: Images shamelessly stolen from The Nose on your Face, who no doubt stole them from someplace else.

How not to get out of a date

Tuesday, November 1st, 2005 • Filed under Kidnappings • 2 Comments

A young woman met a man on the internet and decided she wanted to get on a plane to meet him in person. A the last minute she changed her mind and made a some rather stupid plans. To get out of meeting the man in person, the woman explained that she had been abducted. According to media reports the woman was supposed to fly to Kansas City to meet her new internet boyfriend. She never boarded the plane, but instead called the man and his mother to tell them that she had been abducted after landing in Kansas City. The woman was arrested after police conducted an expensive search for her. If the woman pleads guilty, prosecutors will ask for community service and restitution for the costs of the search, which is estimated to be over $10,000.

Parent attacks referee after metric football game

Sunday, October 30th, 2005 • Filed under Other • Comment

Soccer dad Martin Smith stands accused of sucker punching a referee from his kid’s soccer match. Jeffrey Rousseau, the ref who was attacked, suffered a dislocated jaw and says he never saw the attack coming.

History appears to show that Martin Smith seems to have trouble controlling his temper.

In August, Smith, 41, pleaded innocent to charges he tried to run down a woman with his car following an argument at a gas station, Police Sgt. John Delaney said. He is due back in court for a hearing on that charge next month.

Witnesses told police that Smith shouted threats at the referees during Wednesday’s soccer match between Central and Westfield High School. They said he was upset because a yellow card warning was issued to one of his sons, although Delaney said the other referee made the call.

The victim, Rousseau, who is also an off-duty cop wasn’t even the right referee.