Smile!
Friday, October 19th, 2007 • Filed under Robberies • 1 Comment
Security cameras not only catch criminals in the act, but they also catch their owners in the act, not that way you sickos. Get your mind out of the gutter and get mine while you’re down there.
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Drugs Make You Forget That…Uh…
Friday, October 19th, 2007 • Filed under Drugs • 4 Comments
When an officer asks you for your license and registration, you hand it over to him, no questions asked. Don’t hand him your gun, your bong, your illegal black market baby that you paid cash for or the receipt for the illegal black market baby that you paid cash for or your drug stash.
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Brains Not Included
Tuesday, October 16th, 2007 • Filed under Drugs • 4 Comments
Hey kids, Christmas is just around the corner and your parents need something they can hide their drugs in as they pass through airport security. Why not ask for a Mr. Potato Head?
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Paycheck Heck
Sunday, October 14th, 2007 • Filed under Robberies • 4 Comments
You know about crimes where the accused writes a note on a piece of paper instructing someone to hand over all their money? In this case, we’re surprised the guy they arrested could even write one.
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The Writing’s on the Wall
Thursday, October 11th, 2007 • Filed under Vandalism • 8 Comments
Crimes are always sad, but they’re extra sad when they’re committed by children. It’s like Ray Charles said in “The Blues Brothers,” “It breaks my heart seeing a boy that young going bad.” His heart would have shattered into a million pieces if he read this story and learned some children are going this dumb.
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Cop Out
Tuesday, October 9th, 2007 • Filed under Theft • 4 Comments
For the life of us, we don’t understand why anyone would commit this crime. Unless, of course, they were really really drunk, then it’s mystery solved, my dear Watson.
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Quick, What’s the Number for 911?
Saturday, October 6th, 2007 • Filed under Drugs • 19 Comments
There are some moments in this world that make you stop, sit down and really question the mentality of the human mind. Those moments for me include President Bush’s first election and subsequent re-election, every decision President Bush has made since then and this story.
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Mow It Like You Stole It
Thursday, October 4th, 2007 • Filed under Cars, Drunks • 2 Comments
Only in West Virginia could a man on a riding lawnmower score so much ink in the local paper. If it was in the drive-thru of a Kentucky Fried Chicken during the annual Corn Festival, it would have pushed the Korean peace treaty right off of its lofty spot on the front page.
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