This story might sound like an appropriate subliminal advertisement for the new “Pineapple Express,” opening in theaters everywhere on Aug. 6, but trust us, it’s not. I’d be getting paid a lot more for this crap.
Police arrested two men after they reported a robbery that occurred while they were trying to buy some pot, according to The Wichita Eagle. Read more »
Remember how I said on Monday about not falling asleep at the scene of the crime 876 times. Make that 877 times.
According to the Seattle Times, two burglars fell asleep at the scene after committing their burglary. Read more »
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said 876 times: if you’re going to commit a burglary, make sure you get a good night’s sleep.
One burglar learned this lesson the hard way after he broke into a car and fell asleep when police found him still clutching the stolen goods in his sleepy little hands, according to the Orange County Register. Read more »
This kind of thing has happened a lot since we’ve started this blog. Some hapless crook leaves his wallet at the scene or a burglary or robbery and gets nabbed by the fuzz. This one beats all of those stories by a very wide margin.
According to the New York Post, one crook returned to the scene of the crime hoping to get his wallet back. Read more »
Public nudity is always funny, even if it’s a smoking hot chick who could stop traffic with her killer knobs because chances are she’ll actually stop traffic and cause some kind of massive pile-up. It would bring new meaning to “rubbernecking.”
This naked robber wouldn’t attract the same attention. He stripped down to his shorts, stuffed the dough in his underwear and took off on a bicycle, according to the AP Read more »
Question: You’re a mob boss hiding out from the fuzz. What’s the worst thing you can do?
A. Send out for Chinese and tell the delivery guy to make sure he gives the stuff to the “mob boss who’s hiding from the fuzz”
B. Post a big neon scene outside your hideout that reads, “Mob boss hiding out here. No solicitors.”
C. Start whacking everybody and then yourself in public
D. Play a mob boss on TV
If you chose D, you’ve chosen the dumbest thing a mob boss can do while he’s hiding out from the police, which is exactly what one guy in Italy did, according to Metro.co.uk. Read more »
I’ve spent about two hours trying to think of a clever and funny way to report this robbery story about a guy who holds up a bar with a cheese grater but there really is not way to do it. It’s impossible. If I tried to be funnier than this story by saying something stupid like, “Well, maybe the robber wasn’t an idiot because the clerk’s head was made out of gouda,” you wouldn’t laugh and I would feel shame all over my body.
So as I said before, a man tried to rob a bar with a cheese grater, according to the NWITimes. Read more »
Who says that dumb criminals are only drunks who try to rob a convenience store with a fish or robbers who try to knock off a bank through the drive-thru window. Speeding is technically a crime.
The Kitsap Sun talked to some local cops and got their weirdest excuses for speeding during traffic stops. Read more »
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