Dumb Criminals

A Hard Blow to His Case

When you’re on trial for a certain type of crime, it’s not best to reenact that crime in front of the whole jury unless you really want a free apartment where your toilet is always five inches from your head while you sleep.

According to the St. Paul Pioneer Press, a man on trial for assault slugged his attorney when things weren’t going his way.

The defendant didn’t like the way his trial was going and asked for the judge for a new court-appointed attorney. Well, what did he expect from a free attorney? Soup kitchens don’t serve creme brulet.

So he decided the next best course of action was to headlock his attorney and punch him repeatedly in the head. The attorney recused himself from the case and the judge refused to give him another one, so the defendant had to represent himself for the remainder of the trial. Based on the amount of brain power he’d showcased so far, you can guess where it went from there.

The judge also ordered him to finish out the trial in shackles and his orange jumpsuit, just to complete that “guilty” ensemble he had been constructing since he went all “Ultimate Warrior” on his counsel.



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6 Comments »

  1. cullarn Said,

    May 19, 2008 @ 7:38 pm

    good move there
  2. Bob Said,

    May 25, 2008 @ 10:51 am

    “The attorney recused himself from the case and the judge refused to give him another one, so the defendant had to represent himself for the remainder of the trial.”

    That doesn’t sound legal. Fair, maybe, but even the criminally stupid have a right to an attorney.

  3. Sean Said,

    May 27, 2008 @ 2:06 pm

    Actually it may be legal. It’s an odd call, but if the man would not take an insanity plea and insisted on continuing, the judge has to continue. However the catch here is he cannot put an attorney into a “life threatening” situation. This man kind of blew it for himself by beating up his attorney.

    I think this may very jurisdiction to jurisdiction, but I find it kind of odd too.

  4. tammy Said,

    May 29, 2008 @ 9:09 pm

    man i would have punched back and when he was on the floor just keep punchin till he was out cold.
  5. Daniel Said,

    June 17, 2008 @ 6:55 am

    Tammy sounds to me like another future candidate for this website.
  6. KS Said,

    August 19, 2008 @ 3:30 am

    Agreed, Daniel. Agreed.

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