Dumb Criminals

Closed but No Cigar

Thursday, March 16th, 2006 • Filed under Banks, Robberies

The first rule of bank robbing (other than don’t buy black pantyhose) is that you should always have a plan. And by plan, I mean, remembering to put your pants on first and then your shoes.

Zagreb, Croatia (Ananova) — A bankobber was left empty-handed when he turned up ten minutes late and found the branch had already closed for the day.

Staff at the Podravska Bank in Zagreb, Croatia, told police they were just getting ready to go home when they heard the doors rattling and saw a masked man holding a gun trying to get in.

Shoot, I know that feeling. It’s the end of the day and you’re running to the bank so you’ll have enough cash to go to Dave and Buster’s, get really drunk and scare all the kids as they come out that “Jurassic Park” video game ride, and wouldn’t you know it? They’re closed.

Of course, it’s hard to feel sorry for the burglar in this case, beating on a locked door while he’s still in his getaway get up with a gun in his hand. No one’s going to open a door for that guy. “Say honey, that dressed up like a clown with a bloody axe who’s knocking on the door, should we let him in?”

The sad part of the story is the guy got away and police are hot on his tail. They are warning you that if you see him, be careful because he is armed and ignorant.

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