Joyriding is kind of a strange crime, someone steals a car simply for the purpose of driving it. They don’t steal it to keep it. They don’t steal it to use it to get somewhere. They don’t even steal it to sell it to someone else, say for $150 worth of cocaine (see yesterday’s entry for an explanation to that hastily put together inside joke). They just steal it to drive it. Man, it makes you think, don’t it? These people need a hobby. Like this guy…

SPOKANE VALLEY, Wash. (AP) — A man apparently on a joyride drove off with a emergency medical vehicle as its crew was outside helping an elderly woman, then led authorities on a 52-mile chase before getting stuck in a muddy field, officials said.

When asked why he took the vehicle, clearly marked for emergency medical use, he said just because it was there, investigators said.

Jesse Matthew Vasquez, 26, of Moses Lake, was jailed for investigation of felonies in Washington state and Idaho, Spokane County sheriff’s Cpl. Dale Toliver said.

Wow, “just because it was there.” In any other circumstance, such a life-affirming spontaneous rush to experience joy would be inspiring. If he were actually stealing candy from a baby, it would be inspiring.

Unfortunately, police didn’t catch up with him for 52 miles and 12 squad cars were involved. You know what this means? NASCAR is going to start having ambulance races soon. Boy if you thought listening to some redneck talk about breaking an axle in the 192nd lap was annoying, wait until you hear loud sirens going in a circle for five hours.

The whole thing came to an end when Vasquez left the roadway and got stuck in a muddy field just off the highway. He was uninjured because, sadly, irony is dead.