Dumb Criminals

Doughnut Do This

Tuesday, December 18th, 2007 • Filed under Cars, Theft

Far be it from us to perpetuate stereotypes and cliches surrounding our police officers. We’re grateful for the job they do and don’t wish to smear their reputations for the sake of a cheap joke. The problem is we’re also huge hypocrites and love cheap jokes the way Charlie Sheen loves cheap whores.

According to The Joliet Herald News, a man was caught stealing a car parked by a doughnut shop.

Is that just hilarious, ironic comedy? Joilet has its own prison.

OK, we’re being honest here now. The cops weren’t actually at the doughnut shop. They spotted the vehicle nearby because they smell anything that’s been near a doughnut shop from a mile away.

Even the police chief made the comment to the newspaper that, “You have got to be careful about stealing a car that close to a doughnut shop.” He said it while spitting a chocolate covered maple all over the reporters at the press conference.

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