Dumb Criminals

Mow It Like You Stole It

Thursday, October 4th, 2007 • Filed under Cars, Drunks

Only in West Virginia could a man on a riding lawnmower score so much ink in the local paper. If it was in the drive-thru of a Kentucky Fried Chicken during the annual Corn Festival, it would have pushed the Korean peace treaty right off of its lofty spot on the front page.

According to the Associated Press, police chased a man driving a lawnmower under the influence because he refused to pull over during a traffic stop.

Here’s the kicker: police chased the lawnmower…ON FOOT. The only other way police could have caught a man on foot during a car chase is if he was driving a 1982 Pinto with the optional anti-aerodynamic wind blockers on either side of the car.

A deputy tried to get him to pull over from his cruiser, but when he refused to stop, he jumped out of the car and chased the lawnmower on foot. When he caught up to the lawnmower, the driver still refused to pull over. Take a note kids, never give up.

Eventually, the deputy pulled him off the machine. The driver refused to take a field sobriety test, even though he had a case of beer taped to the front of the lawnmower. Jeff Foxworthy has reportedly asked to buy the driver’s joke rights.

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