Another Monkey Story…with Marijuana! There is a God!
Wednesday, September 24th, 2008 • Filed under Burglaries, Drugs, Theft
Do you ever wonder why God created man and all the animals to live together on the planet Earth? Well, I’m happy to announce that we have discovered the definitive reason why God created monkeys: to provide us with endless hours of entertainment.
In what could possibly be our “Story of the Year…Nay, the Century,” police in Pennsylvania caught a man who kidnapped monkeys, according to the AP.
Police caught the guy after he posted his whereabouts on his MySpace page. Oh MySpace, you give lonely men reason to go on living with realistic friend request porn spam. You replace real human interaction with lazy digital anonymity for teenage girls with low self-esteem and you help the cops catch really dumb criminals. Is there anything you can’t do?
It gets better or worse depending on your point of view. The suspect and his accomplice allegedly broke into the animal sanctuary because they believed there was marijuana stashed inside of it. Something tells me they didn’t steal the monkeys once they broke inside of it. The monkeys led them out by the hand, lectured them on the dangers of public intoxication and tried to get them some medical help.
So remember kids, don’t do drugs, but if you have to, do them under the supervision of a monkey.
Danny says: September 24th, 2008 at 3:23 am
Haha, good read. I submitted this to StumbleUpon too.
Spurwing Plover says: September 24th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Dont monkey around with crime
howie says: September 25th, 2008 at 8:00 am
…
m.mathan says: November 13th, 2008 at 6:23 am
ghghghghghg
panache says: December 4th, 2008 at 10:39 am
Don’t monkey around! What tha monkey?!
Ruri says: December 19th, 2008 at 8:50 am
This, my firends, proves how awesome monkeys can be! XD
Aroura says: March 23rd, 2009 at 3:53 pm
What is our world coming to
madison says: May 8th, 2009 at 9:06 pm
MONKEYS RULE
GO MONKEYS
IF U NEED 2 DO POT MAKE SURE U HAV A MONKEY CLOSE AT HAND
Spurwing Plover says: May 24th, 2009 at 8:43 am
DOPE IS FOR DOPES