Dumb Criminals

BLOW Out the Candles

Friday, September 11th, 2015 • Filed under Drugs

Nothing causes me to fear for society’s future quite like reality shows centered on birthday parties. Have we, as a nation, regressed in intellect so far as to find ourselves entranced by enormous dresses, spoiled children, and strobe lights beckoning us from a television screen? Are we worshipping the mundane, idolizing the bourgeoisie, and perpetuating the stagnancy? Absolutely. Somebody better let Banksy know.

A mother and daughter pair riding a limousine were stopped on their way through London by two cops intending to question the mother due to previous convictions. Their lavish excursion came to a halt when a police dog back at the family’s house uncovered twelve bags of cocaine. According to Huff Post, the mother claimed she had bought the for her daughter’s eighteenth birthday party. So next time you think your parents don’t love you…you’re right.

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