Dumb Criminals

Just Say “Du’h”

images-11.jpgWhen you cover something for awhile, you start to notice certain trends. Political reporters begin to notice that politicians lie. Philadelphia sports writer began to notice that Terrell Owens was a raging a-hole. I am beginning to notice that drug users have about as much common sense as politicians and Terrell Owens…combined.

LONG ISLAND, N.Y. (New York Post) — Long Island cops got a real high when a man phoned because his pot had been pilfered.

Suffolk Detective Sgt. Darrell Dabe said officers responded to the man’s Bellport home on Wednesday to investigate a robbery report.

Michael Omelchunk, 27, vanished when the cops arrived but returned to say armed thugs had “made off with most of” his weed, authorities said.

He called police, left and came back to report his stolen drugs. Why do they call it “dope” again? Seriously, why do they call it “dope”? I’ve never understood that.

The story goes on to report that Omelchunk later admitted he was packaging the weed when the robbery occurred. He tried to fight them off, but in the midst of the struggle, he forgot why he was doing it and they got away.

Police alsoo said his place “reeked” with the smell of wacky-tobacky. He claims it was just the new weed scented Febreze, now available at head shops everywhere.

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5 Comments »

  1. nasty nas Said,

    December 8, 2006 @ 10:31 am

    very funny.

  2. Bob Said,

    December 14, 2006 @ 5:36 pm

    This is actually very common.

  3. amy Said,

    February 5, 2007 @ 12:18 am

    that is just too funny

  4. cody Said,

    October 22, 2007 @ 9:10 am

    i got to get me some of that shit

  5. Dumb Criminals » Once and for All, Police Will Not Recover Your Stolen Stash Said,

    May 3, 2008 @ 2:37 am

    [...] people never learn. After this moment, this moment, this moment and this moment, someone still called police to report that their drugs had been stolen. You know, I’m [...]

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