Dumb Criminals

Goodbye Hal

Tuesday, June 23rd, 2015 • Filed under Guns

How far will anthropomorphizing go? Pixar has assigned pipe dreams to rats. Swiffer has assigned libidos to dusters. M&M’s has assigned genders to chocolate candy. If you thought Disney movies were only the beginning, you probably experience shock and slight disgust every time you turn on your television.

Most likely, you haven’t engaged in overabundant anthropomorphism yourself. A man in Colorado seemed racked with guilt after “killing” his computer with eight shots from a pistol. Supposedly, he was sick of all the trouble it had been giving him, so he took it out back to solve the problem. According to The Smoking Gun, this man with absolutely no previous criminal record actually pleaded guilty to the murder of his computer. He and his girlfriend operate a homeopathic herb store, so I guess he had to purge his energy somewhere. Maybe he needs to lay off the AI science fiction a bit.

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