Dumb Criminals

Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One Before…

Thursday, September 24th, 2009 • Filed under Cars, Drugs17 Comments

Two wrongs never make a right. And that doesn’t necessarily mean that any odd number of total wrongs does equal a right. I was never good with math.

A guy trying to smuggle 5 kilos of heroin got caught because he ran a stop light, according to the Philadelphia Inquirer.

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Super Steal Me

Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009 • Filed under Theft4 Comments

Usually, we cover the insane and bizarre actions of criminals whose intelligence or lack thereof gets them in trouble. This one is different because the people who committed the crime haven’t been though and it still has us scratching our heads.

Someone stole a giant Ronald McDonald statue, according to the Denver Post.

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A Bicycle Built for a Boob

Tuesday, September 22nd, 2009 • Filed under Other1 Comment

Bike riding must be a hard sport. I say must because the only man-powered machine I operate on a daily basis is my television and my reclining leather chair. Maybe bikers aren’t that smart after all.

That would explain why this rider thought he could outrun the police on his little bicycle, according to the Lancashire Evening Post.

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Cop (and Brain) and a Half

Monday, September 21st, 2009 • Filed under Other1 Comment

It’s hard to understand the logic of people who impersonate cops. That is, assuming that they have some ounce of logic in the first place.

One man tried to pass himself as a police officer to another police officer, according to KATU.

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Son of a Gun

Friday, September 18th, 2009 • Filed under Drugs, GunsComment

Guns and drugs don’t mix. In fact, soccer cleats and space walks go together better.

A guy applying for a handgun license got busted for drug possession at the same time, according to the Paladium Item.

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Handicapped in the Head

Thursday, September 17th, 2009 • Filed under Cars, Con-artists, Theft1 Comment

You have to wonder the logic of some people this world. Don’t wonder too hard. You’ll hurt your brain.

One criminal known as the “Sticky Note Bandit” got caught because she parked her car in a handicapped zone while committing one of her crimes, according to KCRA.

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No Parent of the Year

Wednesday, September 16th, 2009 • Filed under Cars, Drugs4 Comments

You have to wonder why some parents chose to become parents. I like to think they didn’t choose to become parents. They just chose whiskey instead of a library card.

One parent who left their child in a car during a drug deal called police when she couldn’t remember where she left the car, according to WPVI.

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The Lights Aren’t On Upstairs

Tuesday, September 15th, 2009 • Filed under Cars, Other3 Comments

Emergency lights are designed to help important vehicles get through clogged traffic to help people in dire need when only seconds count. Notice I didn’t use the word “burger run” anywhere in that description.

Two people turned their vehicle into an emergency vehicle so they could run to McDonalds, according to The Star Press.

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