You know, we here at Dumbcriminals.com do a lot of ribbing and poking and giggling, not just for her pleasure, but for you the faithful reader. And we do it by taking the tales of the not-so-brightest criminal minds and turning them into our twisted finger puppets of tragedy. But sometimes, mostly through no fault of their own, criminals make mistakes - mistakes that any person might make because they’re human, unless their robots. This sounds like one of them. So let’s exploit it, shall we?

VIENNA (Reuters) - A bank robber who was arrested because he left his account card at a branch where he had checked his balance just before holding it up was sentenced to four years in jail.

The knife-wielding robber was identified as a 32-year-old former policeman from Serbia after a clerk who witnessed the heist found the plastic card in the branch shortly afterwards, Austrian news agency APA said on Tuesday.

Hey, I can understand how this can happen. I always leave my keys in weird places — the McDonald’s up the street from my house, the Italian brothel that uses an IHOP as a front, my dog.

But here’s where the dumb gas kicks on: the man calls the bank to report his missing bank card. What’s even dumber is the teller told police it was waiting for him at the police station in a jail cell.

Lesson learned: always have your items ready for easy usage BEFORE you get to the bank teller. Make a note of it.

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• Bank Robbing for Dummies
• Left Behind
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• No Laughing Matter
• Look Before You Reap