The Gouda, the Bad and the Ugly
Wednesday, August 16th, 2006 • Filed under Smugglers
There’s nothing in the world I could say that could possibly be funnier than this crime story. Nothing, not a damn thing. In fact, why are you still reading this? You should be reading the story now. Seriously, stop reading this. What are you, some kind of masochist? Read the damn story already.
PHOENIX, Arizona (Reuters) – Puzzled U.S. border police arrested a Mexican smuggler with 88 pounds (40-kg) of cheese hidden in a special compartment in his truck, police said on Friday.
Customs and Border Protection spokesman Roger Maier said officers at the port of entry in Columbus, New Mexico, referred a Chevrolet pickup for a routine secondary examination on Wednesday.
Officers using an X-ray machine saw the outline of 16 bulky packages stashed in a secret compartment behind the seat, which they initially believed were packets containing illicit drugs.
“Generally if you see something (with the X-ray machine) you expect it to be narcotics, but this turned out to be cheese,” Maier told Reuters by telephone.
Officers regularly impound drugs including marijuana, heroin and cocaine at border crossings from Mexico, although Maier said the smuggled cheese haul was unusual.
He smuggled CHEESE!!! The man risked life, limb and life imprisonment to bring illegal CHEESE into America! CHEESE!!! Oh, I need a nap now.
Ok, ok, calm down. Focus on a joke. Focus on a joke. Ummm, ok, after the U.S. Dairy Council heard about this little not such a “cheese whiz,” they announced they were changing their slogan from “Ahhh, behond the power of cheese” to “He #*$&ing smuggled CHEESE!!!”.
Emily says: January 16th, 2007 at 10:53 am
I’m going to be honest, I think this is absolutely hilarious!!!!! I mean seriously, he smuggled CHEESE!!! of all things I would think of smuggling illegally across the border, that would be the ast thing I would think of.
kiler says: February 22nd, 2007 at 12:30 am
cheese CHEESE!!!! what does he think he is a mexican rat????
no offence mexicans…-.-
Jon says: March 9th, 2007 at 11:00 am
He… smuggled cheese…
what the hell?! o_O
krazey says: March 14th, 2007 at 8:47 am
o’my flip he did what …..lol
well i guess he must have really liked cheese……?!?!?!?!
CHEEZE MONKEYZ!
Logan Hutchison says: March 22nd, 2007 at 10:11 pm
Honestly who would hide cheese for the first thing. Of course someone is gonna think something is up when there is 88 lbs. of it in your truck.
Fukuzawa Yuckichi says: March 27th, 2007 at 3:34 pm
Story cheesy.
Jonnay says: April 2nd, 2007 at 10:05 pm
Guys! Of course he risked all that for cheese! It’s just as good as a drug! Cheese makes EVERYTHING better. What’s better than a ham sandwich? A ham and cheese sandwich, of course. What’s better than steak? Cheese steak. What’s better than chicken? Chicken Parmesan (Parmesan is a type of cheese, in case you didn’t know). Better than a hamburger? Cheeseburger. It really does make all things taste better. It makes corn chips into nachos!
terry the god says: April 22nd, 2007 at 9:44 pm
He said it reminded him of his girlfriend
D. Vineyard says: April 28th, 2007 at 9:11 am
“He said it reminded him of his girlfriend”
Which part?
…right. Sorry ’bout that one.
scar tissue picture says: May 10th, 2007 at 10:15 pm
scar tissue picture…
ha-rd-po-rn-fu-ck 4839325 scar tissue picture info…
indian xxx says: June 5th, 2007 at 6:51 am
indian xxx…
ka-ka-sh-ka 4839325 Catalogue of indian xxx….
Mad Red Queen says: September 25th, 2007 at 10:07 am
“A BULKY package?! Sir, sir, what is this you’re smuggling?! Drugs?”
“No, senior.”
“O…k… Ummm… A DEAD body?!”
“No, senior.”
“O.K… *is joking* lemme guess… some of Mexico’s best moldy cheese?”
“*Gasps* How did you know, senior?!”
Matt says: October 21st, 2007 at 5:57 pm
ROFLMAO CHEESE lol i don’t blame him who doesn’t like cheese who shouldve brought cookies lol jk
Cory says: December 9th, 2007 at 5:18 am
Did they check to see if the cheese contained the drugs?
Raclette says: December 27th, 2007 at 3:13 pm
Was it Swiss Cheese? All the holes would be good for stashing things into for smuggling.
Too bad he wasn’t coming in to California. His response could have been “It’s the Cheese.”
T-Ckraz-E says: March 26th, 2008 at 3:15 pm
wow…dumbass people in the world unless he had some ganja hidden in all that cheese!!then hes one of my homies….
J.T. says: June 13th, 2008 at 8:46 pm
Why would somebody smuggle cheese?!
JoeT. says: September 26th, 2008 at 10:14 pm
Hey Mexican Cheese is good!!! I can’t say I haven’t smuggled cheese.
ROB says: December 12th, 2009 at 12:32 am
the funny thing about that is, the cheese was shot across the bow while the drugs came in right behind it! seriously there was prolly 20 trucks with cheese and 1 with dope crossing at the same time. and once again the smugglers won…. i live in the valley and i dont know any mexicans eating gouda? funny as hell though!