Just about anything involving criminals and a giant vat of poo is always a recipe for disaster. From our perspective, it’s a recipe for hilarity and loud booming laughter that lasts for two days.
A woman trying to steal some manure in Germany fell into a huge vat of it, according to Reuters. Read more »
You can tell an evening has ended the worst way possible when you’re stuck in a pair of handcuffs and there isn’t a stripper, a horny ex-girlfriend or a mildly aroused barfly within 200 yards of your sorry ass.
According to Metro.co.uk, a man handcuffed to a railing after his arrest managed to break free, but got busted again when he showed up at a police station. Read more »
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It’s always nice when someone takes the time to leave someone else a “thank you” note. It’s never nice when someone takes the time to leave someone else a “f*#& you” note.
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ONE OF LIFE’S LITTLE LESSONS #8,933: Sometimes it’s best to not reach for the last cookie. You hear me, fattie? Hands off the last Lorna Doone or you’ll be spitting Nilla Wafers for a week.
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Actually, that’s not quite accurate. Breaking into a jail would be smarter because you’d basically be giving up by putting yourself in your own cell. This guy doesn’t something much less intelligent.
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I can’t tell you how excited I am to finally have a monkey story up here. It’s been a long time. Why am I so excited? Because I like monkeys. They are Mother Nature’s comedy writers. Even their name is funny. And as an added bonus, this story involves monkeys AND pajamas! Oh Santa got my letter after all.
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There are lots of little things everybody can do to help get them through their day. For example, I like to take a nice brisk walk whenever I get a chance. I try not to eat heavy fried foods during the days but I like to treat myself at least once a day. I start my day with a strong cup of coffee. I always remember to wear pants.
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It’s a shame that alcohol makes some men do the most horrid, selfish and illegal things. If only alcohol had a better effect on the human body, like say, you have too few many beers, a shot of whiskey and a sniff of Jaegermeister and the alcohol in your brain mixes with your neurons and you black out. Then when you wake up you realize you’ve been working all night on a cure for cancer.
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