Banks are always a big pain in the ass, even the drive-through lanes that are supposed to make things easier. You’re always in a rush and the line never moves fast enough. You rush your stuff through the tube. Then as you pull out of the lane, you realize your child is missing.

One man rushing through the bank accidentally tried to deposit some drugs with his money, according to the AP.

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I don’t pretend to understand the ins and outs for British Parliament, but it must get just as monotonous and tedious as the American Congress. After all, we were birthed by the very same government, even if we were the red-headed stepchild.

One man bored with listening to British Parliament lit up a joint during the proceedings, according to NZPA.

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It’s always nice and courteous to leave a forwarding message if you’re going to be away and people need to contact you. Except if you left a forwarding address and number in case someone finds your drugs.

That’s just what happened to one man who lost his stash in a hardware store, according to KHQ.com.

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If you’re ever pulled over by the police for a traffic infraction, there aren’t many made-up excuses that will get them out of your hair. Usually, the best excuse is the truth. Note the fact that I said “usually.”

A man stopped by police said he was chasing after a man who had just stolen his marijuana, according to the Hazleton Times.

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Times are tough. People are cutting back on all sorts of things: food, cable, regular pool cleanings, gas for the getaway car.

Two bank robbers were caught when their getaway car ran out of gas, according to CFNews13.com.

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I would say that if you’re going to do something like bribe a police officer during your arrest to have some common sense. But if you’re thinking of offering a bribe to an officer in the first place, something like common sense is probably the further thing from your mind.

A member of a drug dealing ring officer an arresting officer a “joint,” according to Stuff.co.nz.

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Safety is job one here at DumbCriminals HQ. We have fire extinguishers posted on the walls in our staff kitchen. We have fire extinguishers posted at fire exits. We even have fire extinguishers posted next to our fire extinguishers in case they catch on fire.

Some pot growers went too far when their smoke alarm alerted the authorities to their stash, according to the Lancashire Evening Post.

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The worst thing anyone can do is repeat themselves. But the WORST thing anyone can do is repeat themselves.

One burglar learned that lesson when he tried to rob the same place twice, according to The Salem News.

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