Not Your Typical Alarm Clock
Tuesday, January 4th, 2011 • Filed under Cars, Drunks, Robberies • 2 Comments
Advanced, rigorous studies have shown that the number one leading cause for exhaustion is…not enough sleep! Apparently, it has also been linked to childhood obesity, failing grades, poor diet, suicide, global warming, gas prices, drug abuse, communism, and anything else that goes wrong in the world. Well, maybe not communism.
A Poetic Lesson In Self-Control
Tuesday, December 21st, 2010 • Filed under Assaults, Drunks, Guns • 5 Comments
You can burst out laughing during church
During school, you’re allowed to cry
But learn to control AT LEAST your anger
Or you might end up like this dumb guy
It’s Not Just Sneakers This Time…
Tuesday, December 14th, 2010 • Filed under Drunks • 4 Comments
Celebrities get away with everything, don’t they? They can wear the most ridiculous clothes, and it’s suddenly the latest fashion. They can name their children after common household objects, and nobody even gives it a second thought. However, Shia LaBeouf has discovered that this policy does not apply when breaking the law.
Am I Certified…Now?
Friday, December 10th, 2010 • Filed under Drunks • 5 Comments
Valuable Lesson Number One: There will come times in your life where the only thing left to do is shake your head and walk away. After reading this article from ABC Action News, I did just that; along with crying a few tears of pity for humankind.
Driving While Inane
Wednesday, June 16th, 2010 • Filed under Cars, Drunks • 12 Comments
Drinking and driving is never funny, but I’m willing to make an exception in this case.
A man celebrating the end of his 20 year jail sentence for driving while intoxicated get busted for driving while intoxicated, according to the Associated Press.
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Missing Something? Other Than a Brain…
Monday, June 14th, 2010 • Filed under Cars, Drugs, Drunks • 21 Comments
No matter how many times this happens, it still never ceases to amaze me. Even if it happens more than once in a same emergency call.
A man who called police to report a theft including his pot in the list of missing items…and then it gets weird, according to the The Oregonian.
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Totally Trucked
Thursday, October 29th, 2009 • Filed under Cars, Drunks • 10 Comments
The key to avoiding trouble is identifying problems. If the first thought you have after getting wasted is “How am I going to get home?”, congrats. You’ve identified a problem.
A man driving drunk plowed his car into a fire truck, according to WBBM.com.
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Driving While Reclining
Monday, October 26th, 2009 • Filed under Drunks • 15 Comments
It’s amazing how many things police classify as a vehicle: golf carts, horses, living room recliners.
One man was arrested for a driving his La-Z-Boy under the influence, according to the Minneapolis Star Tribune.
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