A Kid is Into Pot
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I tell ya, these kids today make me scratch my head and wonder what with their YouTube and their video games and their Razor scooters and their marijuana and their shotguns…
Dumb Criminals: Guns
Shoot First, Look for Cops Later
We’ve always maintained that there should be stricter requirements for owning guns in this country. You should have to prove that you’ve never committed a crime regardless of how violent or whether or not guns were involved. You should have to show that you’re not a danger to society or would do anything that would constitute harm against another person. You should have to prove your brain is still connected to the rest of your body. Read more »
Squirt First, Ask Questions Later
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There’s something very wrong with our children when some as young as 10 and 12 years old try to hold up a shop, but try to hold up a shop with a water pistol.
Bad Dream House
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STUPID: Trying to settle your differences with a shotgun. STUPIDER: Trying to settle your differences with a shotgun and showing up at the wrong house. STUPIDERER: Trying to settle your differences with a shotgun and showing up at the wrong house of an off-duty sheriff’s deputy.
A Not So Safe Safe
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Guns are just an American right and a staple of the Constitution, but they’re also dangerous, deadly and harmful. Too bad nobody told these Americans.
You Can’t Spell “No You Put YOUR Hands Up” Without N-R-A
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ONE OF LIFE’S LITTLE LESSONS #450 - Members of the NRA love their guns. No, you don’t understand. They looooooove their guns. While other people look for opportunities to network, achieve life’s goals or find their one true love, NRA members look for opportunities to use their guns. The only reason they don’t marry their guns is because it’s subconscious phallic nature could be construed as a form of same-sex marriage.
Screwed-driver
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Remember what Sean Connery said in “The Untouchables”? “Don’t bring a screwdriver to a gun fight and then just claim it’s a gun because you’ll look really lame and stupid.”
A Shot in the Dork
I’ve never been a big “gun person.” But this story about a not-so-smart burglar made me a little happier that we have the Second Amendment. I’m also happy that we have the Fifth Amendment, I don’t have to tell you why.
HOLLYWOOD, Fl. (Miami Herald) — With a man breaking through the front door, a Hollywood 15-year-old loaded his father’s gun, waited for the intruder to come in and shot him, police said.
Keil Jumper, 22, who police said has a long rap sheet, was later found bleeding in an area between two houses. Police said Jumper was seriously injured but his injuries didn’t appear life threatening.
The incident happened about 3:30 a.m. Saturday, when Jumper attempted to break down the front door, then picked up a bicycle to smash the window, police said. The sounds terrified a family of eight to 10 people who were asleep in the home, which is on South 61st Avenue in Hollywood, police said.
Police said the teenager is unlikely to be charged in the case. But they said Jumper, who was shot several times, will be — once he’s discharged from Memorial Regional Hospital in Hollywood.
In the burglar’s defense, he didn’t know the kid had a gun. Then again, he should have realized it was Southern Florida where you get a complimentary gun with a homegrown orange.
Police said he was seriously injured, but he would probably survive. Wish I could say the same for his dignity.
In a related story, National Rifle Association President Kayne Robinson announced that the 15-year old boy will be the recipient of their Humanitarian award.
