Lobster Thief Gets Pinched
Monday, October 13th, 2008 • Filed under Uncategorized
When a criminal does something that even the dorks on “jackass” won’t do, you’ve reached a whole new low in stupidity. In fact, it can’t even be called stupidity. I shall make up a name for that level now – “shtumlippity.”
A guy in San Diego got caught stealing lobsters from traps and hiding them in his pants, according to the AP.
That doesn’t so much for his manhood since he’s basically admitted he doesn’t have much to lose by hiding animals in his pants that are born with garden shears for hands.
Police saved the lobsters from the treacherous depths of the thief’s pants and returned them to the water. Then they added some onion, chilled butter, lime sauce, whipping cream and a dash of white wine to the water and justice was served.
DC Head Honcho says: October 14th, 2008 at 9:51 pm
Ok then, put this CALIFORNIAN lobster in your pants. That’s what I thought.
Who cares says: October 29th, 2008 at 3:59 am
FIne, so CA lobsters have spikes instead of claws. Edit the article to say “I guess he wanted to decorate his manhood by getting a Prince Albert the eco-friendly way.”
Lobster Thief « Issac Newton Awards says: October 30th, 2008 at 12:00 am
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Anonymous says: January 17th, 2012 at 1:36 pm
That doesn’t surprise me. Maybe he had crabs.